As I write this I’m getting ready to go on holiday.  Part of me wants to go.  Another part of me really hates the airport, queues, security side of things, as well as feeling guilty as I look down at my expanding carbon footprint.

Will a review of the Guardian Weekly archive make me feel any better about this?  I fear not.  Whether you see yourself as a traveller or a tourist, the news isn’t good.  In the archive, travellers are still associated with tales, but they are most strongly linked to stranded and delays.  Even more depressingly, the tourist is just a consumer of travel: brochures, attractions, resorts, hotels and spots, are all on offer, along with the hassle of visas and tourist traps.  Yet despite all this, tourists still flock to places which offer luxury and facilities.

You might have noticed that everything so far has been about the destination rather than the journey. What does the Guardian Weekly say about how we get from A to B?  The most frequent means of transport reported in this newspaper are: train(s) (2,830), plane(s) (2,796), ship(s) (2,311), boat(s) (2,028), and truck(s) (1,324).  Lorries(s) (604), bicycle(s) (359), bike(s) (321), and old fashioned aeroplane(s) (135) are much less used.

Is the fact that trains are more in the news than planes a sign that we’re getting greener?  Unfortunately, it seems not.  Train(s) goes with: robber, derailed, Biggs (Ronnie Biggs – one of the Great Train robbers), crash, bombings and collided.  Nothing very green there.

Are planes greener or safer?  It doesn’t look like it.  Closest associates of plane are spotters (harmless enough unless the authorities think you are spying), but this is followed by crashed, crash, landed and stupid (the anti-flying protest organisation Plane Stupid), while with planes it’s oddly military: grounded, warships, helicopters, bombed, satellites, artillery, bases, patrol.
Are ships and boats better?  Not from a news perspective –  they tend to run aground, or sink.  Travel by boat and you’re most likely to find yourself in something that is overloaded, capsized or sinking. Go on a truck? Only if you want to travel with a bomb or explosives.

How will I be travelling?  I wish I could say it was on foot or by bike, but I’m afraid that this year I will be joining many others who are waiting in the queue at airport security.

Incoming search terms:

• travelling